Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Wellness Wednesday - Relationship Success failing because of Personal Success??

I read this blog post today and it got me to thinking. The author poses that women, in their quest for Daddy's love as little girls, feel the need to succeed professionally, masculinely instead of loving themselves in all their "feminine" glory. His point ultimately is that you should be happy with who you are instead of looking for outside validation. I'm not sure I agree with his reasoning though...

As a girl I was often successful at things I wanted to do, school, singing, modeling, etc. but I dont think that made my Daddy love me any more and I sure as heck didnt do it for his recognition. In fact coming from a family in which success is rare, I actually think my acheivements, though they appreciated them, created a wall between me and my family. They had a difficult time relating to me.

In romantic relationships I feel like sometimes success, female success, is intimidating to men rather than enticing. Now I am not advocating dumbing oneself down for approval, far from it! I just disagree that we are spending so much time focused on personal successes rather than accepting ourselves. I am quite the advocate for living in the moment, but it is NEVER wrong to strive to better yourself and make forward strides.

If the author's point is that you are enough NOW and you do not NEED to be anything more than what you are right now to be loved, that you should not wait until some future date of perfection to put yourself out there, then I whole heartedly agree. But the idea that we are successful JUST to find love puts me off a bit...

What do you think??

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